| 2026-09-05 | Shiny material |
| 2026-09-01 | Uncool |
| 2026-08-16 | Uncool |
| 2026-07-05 | Really weak, as an excuse |
| 2025-12-28 | Glitzy fabric |
| 2024-12-15 | Flimsy, as an excuse |
| 2024-02-19 | Shiny fabric |
| 2023-05-28 | Metallic fabric |
| 2022-04-06 | Shiny fabric |
| 2021-06-20 | How kids might describe dad jokes |
| 2021-06-16 | Fancy fabric |
| 2021-05-16 | Metallic fabric |
| 2020-05-27 | Like a horse that can no longer be ridden |
| 2020-04-28 | ___ duck |
| 2020-03-08 | Fabric with sheen |
| 2019-10-16 | Shiny fabric |
| 2018-11-05 | Unfunny, as a joke |
| 2018-09-16 | Uncool |
| 2017-01-21 | Sorry |
| 2016-11-03 | Hardly adequate |
| 2016-09-15 | Wake |
| 2016-09-06 | Totally uncool |
| 2016-01-05 | Not cool, informally |
| 2015-04-05 | Unbelievable, say |
| 2015-03-22 | Flimsy |
| 2014-02-13 | Unconvincing |
| 2013-05-06 | Limping, say |
| 2012-01-27 | Weak |
| 2011-09-27 | Hobbling, say |
| 2011-08-24 | Uncool |
| 2011-07-07 | Unconvincing |
| 2010-03-31 | Half-baked |
| 2009-07-23 | Pricey fabric |
| 2009-02-22 | Unconvincing |
| 2009-01-31 | Showy wear |
| 2008-12-02 | Pathetic |
| 2008-10-07 | Weak |
| 2008-02-12 | Poor, as an excuse |
| 2007-06-26 | Poor, as excuses go |
| 2007-06-06 | Formal fabric |
| 2006-11-09 | Beneath serious consideration |
| 2006-10-18 | Inadequate |
| 2006-09-15 | Hobbling |
| 2005-06-01 | Weak, as an effort |
| 2005-05-05 | Not really believable |
| 2005-03-02 | ___ duck |
| 2004-12-09 | Hobbling |
| 2004-11-28 | Dress material for a ball |
| 2004-11-15 | Hobbling |
| 2004-06-22 | Poor, as excuses go |
| 2004-06-09 | Poor, as excuses go |
| 2004-05-06 | Unconvincing |
| 2004-04-23 | Pathetic |
| 2003-09-08 | Like some excuses |
| 2003-08-17 | Unconvincing |
| 2003-07-01 | Pathetic |
| 2003-06-10 | Shiny gold fabric |
| 2003-05-27 | Flimsy, as an excuse |
| 2003-05-20 | Liberace fabric |
| 2002-12-29 | Fancy fabric |
| 2002-02-23 | Getting hardly any laughs |
| 2002-02-04 | Hobbling |
| 2001-11-19 | Weak, as an excuse |
| 2001-03-28 | Couturier's fabric |
| 2001-01-16 | Crippled |
| 2000-12-11 | Fabric with gold or silver threads |
| 2000-11-29 | Unable to walk |
| 2000-06-26 | Disabled |
| 2000-05-13 | Gold ___ |
| 2000-01-04 | Poor, as excuses go |
| 1999-12-17 | Unconvincing |
| 1999-02-25 | Glittery material |
| 1998-04-01 | Hardly believable |
| 1997-12-23 | Hardly believable |
| 1997-11-29 | Sorry |
| 1997-10-05 | Pathetic |
| 1997-06-02 | Shiny fabric |
| 1996-12-20 | Break a leg? |
| 1996-04-24 | Glittery fabric |
| 1995-10-19 | Ineffectual |
| 1995-08-30 | Metallic fabric |
| 1995-08-13 | Shoot in the foot? |
| 1995-06-19 | Weak, as an excuse |
| 1994-07-13 | Hamstrung |
| 1994-07-04 | Costly cloth |